Yin Yang

Here is an interesting quote from a Vulcan character on STV:

"Without the darkness, how would we recognise the light? Do not fear your negative thoughts. They are part of you. They are part of every living being, ...... We learned to control it, but it is still part of us. To pretend it does not exist is to create an opportunity for it to escape."

T.J.I.F.

Greetings friends :)


You have completed the ritual of one week.

A lot has been accomplished these past five days.

You may not see it clearly now, but soon you will be able to look back and contemplate the adventures we experienced, the obstacles we circumvented, and another leg of the journey we triumphed.

I am so proud of you my friend.

Just remember the past is now past, and the future is still a blur, live in the present, experience the now, and bask in the life that flows around you :)

I did it, I was able to complete another evening work out.

I know how it is, I get home and plop on the couch, knowing that the means are there, and thinking:

“Hey I did it for five days straight I can skip this evening…”

But I did not, I got up and pushed myself, pushed until I could not do anymore, then push even more.

Soon I will be use to the pain.

The pain will then fade into the background.

Become a part of me.

And I will be a new J

Strengthened from my own weaknesses.

Steel needs to be softened and banged around before it can become a strong metal.

Thank you for checking in.

Have a wonderful night.

Sweet dreams.

Be safe tomorrow

Have an amazing weekend.

Your friend,

~J

Wow i am in more pain than i thought <-J>

I AM A man

Greetings my friends

We have successfully concluded a Thursday.

You have my permission to congratulate yourselves.

Go ahead I will wait…

…ready?

I know I am alive.

From the pain I feel after my workouts.

I push myself until I cannot lift my arms.

Then I push harder.

The toxins I have partaken in the past thirty years flow from my pores and soak up my shirt

The pain is excruciating

Excruciatingly wonderful…

I feel.

I live.

The Man

Enjoy your evening

Sleep well

Your friend,

~ J

Hi friend :) i am blogging from my phone this evening because i am not home, i found myself in a different place this evening. I became restless after my <-J>

.... Workout and had to get out of the house. After an hour of driving i find myself in a diner in a town i past many times but never stopped by <-J>


Although i want to keep driving, i have work in the morning and need to head back, but i think i will stay here a little longer (the waitress is cute) <-J>
 
.....and she keeps smiling at me :) <-J>

After every workout i feel different, in a good way, although i seem to be pushing myself too hard to keep the demons away <-J>

outer demons

This is it friends, it seems that the demons hovering outside my cottage want in again.


They kept bombarding.

The struggle with this journey of mine seems to have it some rocky and steep terrain.

I could take the easy path, paved with pizza and cakes.

But it seems the dangerous one it is....

I over did my workout this evening, feeling a bit light.

I guess that is the point to feel lighter.

But not in the head.

The demons quit for now.

well my friends I cannot see what the future has in store.

In the meantime I will continue the good fight.

I have accepted this is a path I must continue down on my own.

Thank you for checking in.

Sweet dreams.

Your good friend
~ J

DeFacedbook

Greetings :)

I trust you had an interesting Monday?

Well do not sweat it my friend, we made it to Tuesday's end.   Tomorow is the hump day of the week.

The weekend is just up the block and there will be a full 48 hours to complain about what transpired the previous 40+

Me?

I am choosing to enjoy my week so I can have a relaxing and adventurous weekend.

Yes that is right I am more relaxed when I am out on one of my crazy adventures.

Thank you for checking in.

oh and by the way, I am staying off of Facebook until the change the news feeds back to the way it was, it was too confusing before with the explosion of dating ads and  escaping farm ville/town animals.

Now it is just down right....

not sure, but I am staying off and sticking to my blog

So if you want my update.

I will be here ;-)

Your friend
~ J

The week has an end, we call this Friday, and for desert Saturday and Sundae

Hello again!!


I see despite my mundane rumblings you have returned to my secluded oasis on the web.

I am glad to see you again, I am overwhelmed with honor.

I would like to tell you about my week, but first I want to let you know that no matter how yours went (good bad indifferent) you have made it to this point, smarter, stronger, wiser, and more intelligent than when you started your journey on Monday.

I will start my journey through the third week of October on Sunday.

I have come to accept this day as my day of reflection. Here I use the time to evaluate my accomplishments and my failures of the previous week and use it to create a better J for the one to follow.

This past Sunday was an exceptional day of flaw finding. Do not get me wrong I never end my weeks with regrets. Dwelling on the past only consumes the time of possible accomplishments of the future.

I am glad that I am able to find the areas where I need improvement, there was a time I deluded myself in a blanket of pretention blinded by the feeling that I was always right and everyone else…

Well you get the idea.

So you see, I now can see past my ego and learn from errors both small and large.

With that I embraced Monday as a day of new beginnings

(rather than the illusion of autonomous desolation we adapted over the generations of dread)

Instead of blinding ourselves to a mundane daily grind. We need to open our eyes to a new realm of possibilities each Monday has in store for us.

When I started this letter I had the intentions of spilling the gossips of work life. Instead I will tell you about the three conversations I had with three very different people this week.

An acquaintance, a stranger, and my Uncle

On Tuesday I ran into an old co-worker I knew back in my days as a telemarketer.

Then we were slaves to our work week and used our weekends to complain about work.

Today we found ourselves at the opposite ends of life changing experiences.

I learned that she has been through two deaths this past year alone; of loved ones that were real close.

Her sister and a close friend from grade school that she kept in touch with over four decades.

I was saddened by her ordeal and felt compelled to sit with her longer that the obligatory “hey how is the weather, see you around….”

We spoke for a bit and with a loss of that magnitude I knew there was healing to come. However I learned that despite their lives cut too short, she walked away with something from each of them. And instead of falling into a pit of self-pity, she is using this experience to make her stronger. And the knowledge that her close friend and close sibling will live on in the hearts of their children and their values and teachings will be passed on generations to come.

Wednesday, before I continue with this adventure, I need to add that Wednesdays is the day I have a standing dinner with my uncle, earlier we mutually agreed this will take place on Thursday.

On Wednesday I found myself in an interesting predicament. I was at odds with a few decisions and my road did not just fork but veered off into several different directions. Depending on a path I took I would either hurt myself in the long run, or hurt people that are close to me.

However an unknown was placed into my path. I exchanged words with a person I did not know in a misunderstanding that never should have taken place; but it did. This stranger said some things that hauntingly hit close to home.

(Sorry that I am being obscure, I want to get this down without giving out details, its not about what took place but what I walked away with in the end.)

To get to the point the short conversation I had with this stranger actually put things into perspective for me and where I thought was a fork in the road was actually a winding path, albeit difficult, I was able to make it through without any doubts.

Thursday was a bit more personal. It was my time with whom I consider a mentor. I learned something about my uncle, his words are wise, and I am proud of how far he has come in the past 22 years.

Well if you made it this far into my ramblings, than you are a better person than I.

Enjoy your weekend.

Do not let the trivialities of your week interfere with your enjoyment, remember the past is not paying you rent so do not let it occupy your mind ;-).

Thank you

Your close friend

~ J

Today is your day

Just because this is my blog (and I am sure that Iam the only reader) it does not mean I do not recognize you as a magnificent wonderful human being. 

You are a unique individual and I am honored to know you. 

Thank you for being you and there is nothing I would want to change.

I look forward to meeting you again everyday as a brand new and totally interesting person.

Thank you

Your Friend
~J

Did 20 full situps, before you laugh this is a great accomplishment from a former 420lb freak who used to consider a sit up as reaching for the remote <-J>

Had a nice salad for dinner, made from scratch, considering becomeing a softcore vegetarian <-J>

What a magnificent day, I am looking forward to my drive back home <-J>

Eating dinner at the Cracker Barrel, wondering how would it be if one day i went out and left my devices at home.

Would the world miss J? 

Would I miss the world? 

<-J>

... <-J>

No wonder i can not sleep, while my mind is processing something that transpired an hour ago, three new events are posted, and a fourth is transpiring <-J>

We live in an age where information is posted as the event the subject of the information is occuring <-J>

I am blogging from my phone <-J>

Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain

To whom it may concern,

If you are the unlikely patron who happens by this blog please note that this is just my ramblings to sort the erratic thoughts in my head rather than a mundane account of my daily happenings.

If you do wish to read a blog of some note feel free to click that "next blog" button located to the top left of this page.

Thank you for stopping by.

enjoy the banana cream pie.

~J

Counting sheep losing my place

Why cant I fall asleep?

My mind continues to race with a finite of possibilities. 

I cannot focus on just one thought.

Counting sheep only is so distracting until I get to 1342

then it is just another thought in a chain of thoughts

until I find myself blogging about sleep

Complicated certainties

The more I attempt to simplify my life the more complex is seems to become.



If I try to work this from a different approach, maybe I should try to complicate things.



By complicated things it will create an air of mystery.



No one will know what J is going to do next…



So if I change tactics and try a more complex approach, would the results be the same as my attempts to simplify my life?

There is nothing like a good workout to give a clear perspective on life <-J>

I often wonder if i am in a play and the world is here for my amusment <-J>

Going to apply for the Amazing Race <-J>

What a magnicent day it is, I need to get out <-J>

I love my job, living my dream; technology and education is my reeses peanut butter cup <-J>

Counting Infinity Losing my Place

 

Okay folks big J picked himself up a workout bench, no excuses, next time you see me i will be PUMPED UP <-J>

Just drove past a sign that read 'Do not text and drive' <-J>

Today is my half birthday, i know this may seem silly but I was raised believing this was a celebrated tradition; today I am 34 1/2 <-J>

Obama won a nobel peace prize?

I think i slipped and fell into a darker alternative universe <-J>

Sometimes playing games is what the situation calls for <-J>

Wednesday

I having a standing dinner with my uncle every Wednesday evening, this is somewhat of a undisclosed routine.

I look forward to this time because it is a nonjudgmental way to clear things about my life and learn and grow from him. I believe he gets out of our discussions a similar rewarding experience.

I do not think I would have made it this far in my journey of self improvement if it was not for my uncle and his wisdom.

I believe life can be more rewarding if everyone set aside a regular time with family or friends if not to break bread with each other, but just to sit, talk, and possibly learn.

Not just on the mandatory holidays, but outside the norm.

As a highly developed social species surrounded by telecommunications, tv, and the internet, we lose focus on the basic human need to sit down and talk face to face.

Today is a good day <-J>

I found my good pair of sunglasses, it was in a classroom i would have never concieved of leaving it there <-J>

The worst of my head cold is past i am still a bit disoriented by otherwise ok <-J>

We can not give in to the mentality of negativity, by creating a positive outlook we can overcome most obstacles and the ones we cant we learn to enjoy <-J>

My day started pretty crappy (health wise) but after lunch i refused to give in to the bug and willed myself to feel good <-J>

My religion is very simple; my religion is kindness <-J>

Finality

I have stored the objects of my memories into a decorative wooden box. Locked them away in my closet of past and disregarded the key.




I am concluded; it is time to close another chapter in my life and start a new one.



Just because things seem to have finality to them does not mean our story is over.

Simple Observation

I have noticed that when some people first meet me they seem to be angered by my very presence.  It is only by getting to know me that they soften to my charm.

Today is Friday or is it Monday?

This darn flu bug has finally caught up with the J man. All the Vitamin C, Echinacea, and the antibacterial liquid did not fend it off.




I kept thinking today was Friday, do not get me wrong; it was not wishful thinking; I thoroughly enjoy my job, and nine times out of 10, I do not know what to do with my off time.



But today felt so much like a Friday I would snap back into reality, remembering it was a Monday.



Now I realize today is Tuesday. For my life, I cannot recall anything that happened yesterday. All I remember was going to bed on Sunday and waking up this morning (Tuesday morning).



I lost an entire day. I cannot be from forgetting my Synthroid, for I took it Sunday, and I know I took it this morning, and it takes at least three days of failing to take my meds before I begin to experience subtle forms of dementia.



I am missing an entire day.

-j-