Endings before beginnings

The first half of 2013 is almost over; the highs and lows were exhausting.

I realize now I cannot write; a wordsmith, I am no longer. 

My thoughts escape me. I am now just putting words to the screen, attempting to make sense of the ideas that swim around my skull, bouncing through the hollows that a brain once occupied, witnessing the points of my IQ drop.

Not sure what I am doing wrong to suffer so much rejection in my life; the only way to avoid hurt is to prevent people (says the people person).

~ j

(I know this is a duplicate post, but I liked this title, so I kept it. Also, I inserted some extra words in this one. Let's see if you can find them)